top of page
  • jesca

princess perfection

Updated: Jul 1, 2022

Apparently I snored last night.  You know how I know this?!... He told the whole sales office today at the dealership. 

And not just a " Ya, you snored a bit last night, it was totally adorable"  It was more like " Holy *(#)% , I thought I was sleeping next to a rhinoceros last night... Or a dirt bike, I kept nudging ya to wake up" (what a charmer)

As the fellas giggled like school girls... Three responses came to my head.

1- "Oh no! I'm so sorry! I had a lot of wine last night"... (sheepish smile)

2- "Oh ya?! Well you... You Sound like an animal bigger than a Rhino!" (that'll show him)

3- Smile & #Hairflip like you meant to do it....

I went with Option 1. A quick apology for awakening him from his slumber with my apparently unadorable lady snores & the super legit excuse of why I probably passed the heck out after four glasses of wine.  That's right folks...Wine... The four letter word that had me singing Shoop at the top of my lungs on the way home followed up by Run DMC Tricky while I was manually flashing the dome light in my Jeep on and off like creating my own rave. (I was the passenger of course)  You know what is so boring?! Having the most fun ever on the way home...& then you pull in to the driveway and have to act sort of serious because everyone else is.  So annoying! Get on my level people!

Tomorrow night I will staying the evening at Singer Castle.  A historic castle in the 1000 islands... On an island named Dark Island...  Allll night in an ancient fortress made of thick stone walls, battlements, secret passageways & towers.  A tower where I could let my long locks flow out the window and sit there and wait (forever) for ole Prince Charming to climb up and visit...But he will be busy working on his racecar. Disney really messed up my expectations. 

A castle full of history, dungeons, dragons and ghosts?! I cant even! But allll I know is I will be drinking Wine and strapping a go-pro to my head for the evening.  Stayyy tuned for that one...All I can really envision is me running around the island like a giggling rendition of the blair witch project.

Actually I still have to pack... What does one even bring to a castle?   A ballgown obvi. Glass Slippers. Sperrys. Walkie Talkies. A lifevest.  A pumpkin just in case.  & ill be sure to leave the address to the tallest tower just incase I take a bite of a poison apple or poke a spindle.

Then here it comes out of the blue... My little thought bubbles.  Do Disney Princesses snore? I mean it seems like they practically get themselves into these situations where they end up sleeping half of their lifetime away. Lying there flat on their backs with their perfect golden locks flowing over their pink satin princess pillows, Their arms crossed holding a beautiful rose...Their little pout perfect lips closed while their amaze eyelashes flutter with every breath. But seriously... Are they mouth breathers? Do they breathe heavily? Do they ever sleep with their mouth open? Do they drink wine?

Maybe we aren't suppose to know these things.  Maybe we are to stick with the projected Disney Image of Princess Perfection.  An image I have been trying to portray for the last 30 years of my life until this morning at around 11:15 am when my cover was blown. 

275 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

You do you, boo boo

As I’m floating around my lil hot tub … I hydro-levitate from seat to seat & try them all… the lounger is a real struggle because I drown a little … but I sit here and I think about my life as I liste

bottom of page